DAILY CARD DRAW 2

3.12.10

The Knight of Masks

While I shuffled I asked what lay in front of me over the next six months, and the underlying question was, ‘Who am I now?’ This card is an arms and head close-up of a young woman; she’s wearing fingerless black lace gloves and a black bodice laced at the front, holding a mask up to her face. Her auburn hair hangs loose and we glimpse some kind of mansion in the background. She wears a black lace choker at her throat which is the only decoration bar the mask which is a red and gold cat-like creation, all swirls and curlicues.

‘Here I am,’ she is saying, ‘don’t you recognise me?’

I see someone who wants me to follow them, daring me to have the nerve to be honest and cool, to enter under my own steam. She is not laughing or sneering but I can see that she is wondering if I’ll give up and walk away. So this feels like a challenge but one from a friend or a sister; it’s a caring look that assures me that this is the right party for me.

Invitations will fly around me! And small challenges. The woman’s hands are wide open and I think she’s telling me to keep my eyes open and the way clear – she could be telling me to cut and colour my hair, to wear make-up for a change, to dress up and be more decorative than the old slump that I am most of the time. She might be saying, ‘Look at your eyes, dress up your hair – show something off.’

Actually I was very aware last Saturday that while my friend was all dressed up (we’d gone to the pictures with my two older grandsons to see Harry Potter) I hadn’t bothered to do anything more that get washed and dressed – and in old ordinary clothes at that. I should have made an effort. So do I have to dress up now? Do I have to make something of myself? Probably definitely. And another thing: number two grandson took my photograph on the train and I look like an old woman. I am an old woman, so what does it matter? It matters, apparently.

Yes, this has made me think about the impression I give of myself; I really don’t give a fig, but it wouldn’t hurt me to make an attempt at being presentable and more sociable – oh no not that!

Again, I have followed the card’s image and worked my way through it to arrive at these conclusions. The presence of The Knight of Masks might mean a change of situation for me, travel or the absence of someone. My oldest grandson is planning to join the army as soon as he can and he will be sixteen in April, so this might coincide with that.

So far, I’m happy with what has come up with these cards, but there is not a lot of symbolism here is there?

Note:

I received an invitation from my son and his wife to join them, their five children and their other granny for Christmas dinner out in a restaurant! So that's my first invitation arriving 24 hrs after the reading – the small challenges will be keeping order 'cause these kids are wild!

- back to the future

No real change has occurred; I still hang myself out like an old woman who was never young and beautiful...no, my attitude is that I've been there done that so why should I have to bother with any of it now? I have six grandchildren and a great grandson...and a new grandson on the way - I can do what the hell I want! Actually I hardly leave the flat and love living in my wee cave, in my baggy old dresses, listening to audio books, whole series again and again...playing the favourites.